Category Archives: booze

Oh walmart, you vixen

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Savings: $877.48

Did you know they sold tiki bars? Neither did I. Lucky for me (and by “me” I actually mean Michael) right now I have no where to put one.

But we will have a pool soon (albeit shared with the rest of the tenants of our apartment complex.). I bet I’d make friends real quick like if I brought one of these bad boys to the yard…

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One final booze-related post tonight

FREE!  x 2!!! Thanks Lanchi and Chris!!

FREE! x 2!!! Thanks Lanchi and Chris!! (And yes, that is a green silly putty egg on the floor at my office. I can’t hide it.)

I just have to shout out to Lanchi for bringing me not one, but TWO wine openers yesterday. Her husband works in the wine business and gets these free, which is great because I have managed to lose ALL of mine.

And this is a problem. Especially when you go thrifting with your friend Lanchi and all you really want to do afterwards is go have a glass of wine at the wine bar across the street and they are closed for the holiday even though the holiday isn’t until TOMORROW!!! And there is no other decent place for a glass of wine in your neighborhood so you go home and try to open a bottle and it WON’T OPEN!!! So you try your Brookstone air-blower/poker/wine-opener thingie but you’ve already put a hole in the cork and now that thing is useless, not to mention dangerous. And you’re a mom of a small boy toddler who has one good night off a week (and one of you has TWO small boys) and you’re about ready to break that thing off on the counter when you suddenly feel a surge of super-human, bionic-ish strength and that fucker finally comes out. Ahhhh…

Where was I? Oh, problems. Yes, I clearly have them. But the wine opener disappearance thing was especially troubling because, as my husband wrote back to me after I jubilantly messaged him this picture of the new one she gave me, “I think that’s funny in the milieu of the last few weeks. Super achievers: check. Capable of keeping at least one good wine opener in house: fail.” (Disclaimer: he’s speaking about himself as a super achiever, though. I am grateful he shares his credentials with me but I’m just pretty much a normal achiever.) But it seems like it would be pretty easy to just keep at least ONE wine opener in the house, considering how many I’ve actually owned in my life and now can no longer locate which is a lot.

So, Lanchi, I thank you again.  Both for your thoughtfulness and for sticking with me when that bottle wouldn’t open.

I hope these are for in your purse and not… oh good lord

You know you have a problem when… you buy these.

Savings: $12.00, a trip to Betty Ford

Savings: $12.00, a trip to Betty Ford

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We are from France

Often, when you find things made in France, it’s pretty natural to want to say, “Of course it’s from France.” Most of those things are obvious, like Serge Gainsborough and mayonnaise. But I will admit that this seemed to me much more of an American product so I was pretty surprised to see that little French flag on the label but there it was. And there it is.

Savings: 11.99 (a guess, I forgot to look) x 2.  Because you can't just buy one.

Savings: 11.99 (a guess, I forgot to look) x 2. Because you can’t just buy one.

This was at Target, prounounced “Tar-zhay!”, especially if you’re there to buy cake and whipped cream flavored vodka from France. Which I wasn’t. Don’t get me wrong. I like me some cake, and some whipped cream… and oh hell yeah I like vodka. But I was there to buy box wine. To take camping. Not even joking at all about that.

Shout out to one of my favorite (fake) things that was “from France”, the Coneheads:

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